It’s Totally Normal if One of You Isn’t Excited About Doing a Family Photo Session
Let’s be honest for a second: when a client books a family session with me, it’s often Mum who’s been dreaming about capturing this season of life in photos. She’s the one who fills in the enquiry form, chats with me on the phone, and starts imagining those beautiful moments hanging on the walls.
Then there’s the reluctant partner.
In many families, that person is Dad. He’s likely the one side-eyeing the idea of a photographer arriving at his house to follow him around while he’s just trying to drink his coffee in peace. I’ve seen the hesitation—plenty of it—and I completely understand where it comes from.
But here’s what I want you to know: reluctance is not resistance.
Most of the time, that hesitation isn’t about not wanting to be in photos at all. It’s about a mismatch of expectations. Dads (or a reluctant partner) often imagine a traditional photoshoot where everything needs to be pristine, perfectly posed, and painfully stiff. And let’s be honest, that doesn’t sound fun to anyone.
The good news? My approach is completely different. It’s relaxed, documentary-style family photography in London (and beyond – even abroad), and it allows every member of the family to truly be themselves.
Why Parents (Especially Dads) Think They’ll Hate Family Photography
From what I’ve seen over the years, dads often imagine that a family photo session will involve:
- Dressing up uncomfortably
- Keeping everyone on their best behaviour
- Standing still in front of a camera with a forced smile
- A long list of do’s and don’ts that make the whole thing feel more like work than fun
But when I show up, I’m not asking them to put on a show. In fact, I prefer if they don’t.
Instead, I step into your life as it naturally unfolds. I take the pressure off and invite families to do what they love doing anyway—going to the park, playing music, cuddling on the sofa, building Lego castles, or making pancakes in pyjamas. And when they’re immersed in that, I document the beautiful in-between moments that deserve to be remembered.
I’ve seen reluctant dads – the ones who start the session with crossed arms and quiet scepticism – end up laughing with their kids, showing off their guitar collection, or racing scooters down the pavement, completely forgetting I’m even there. By the end? They typically thank me. And they love the final images just as much as everyone else.
How to Help a Reluctant Partner Feel Comfortable in Family Photos
1. Let Dads Be Themselves
The beauty of documentary-style photography is that no one is expected to pose or perform. There are no awkward staged moments or unnatural smiles. Instead, your partner gets to:
- Ride a bike with the kids
- Push the swing at the park
- Make a puzzle on the living room floor
- Bake pancakes for breakfast
- Read a book and then fall asleep themselves
It’s all part of your real story—the kind you’ll want to hold onto 10, 20, even 40 years from now. And I’m there to gently photograph that magic without disruption.
2. Involve Them Early On
One of my favourite tips: invite your partner to be part of the planning from the start. When they help complete my pre-session questionnaire or join the video call, they:
- Get to ask their questions
- Hear directly from me what to expect
- Help decide where we should shoot and which activities are meaningful to them (home? local park? backyard?)
- Realise it won’t be a rigid, awkward experience
Connection and comfort begin before the session ever starts. And when your partner genuinely knows that I’m not there to judge or pose, the whole dynamic changes.
3. Remember That Dads Matter in Photos Too
Let’s take a moment to get a little personal here: I lost my own dad when I was just four years old. The photos I have of him are irreplaceable. They aren’t perfect, but they are powerful. They remind me how loved I was. How present he was. How real life looked when he was in it.
This is why I do what I do.
It’s why I believe all parents (yes, also you, your partner of your husband!) should be in the frame—even if it’s not their favourite activity—because these photos tell your child the story of being loved. Not just the story of beautiful light and neat hair, but the story of affection, playful chaos, ordinary rituals, and the trust that comes from a steady presence.
You matter in the photo. Whether you’re throwing your child in the air while they squeal with laughter or drinking coffee while watching them scribble on paper, you’re part of their history—and you deserve to have that preserved.
Proof That Dads Really Do Enjoy Family Photos
Still not convinced? You’re not alone, and neither are the dads who start out unsure.
Here’s what one family had to say after their session:
“We had a family photoshoot with Saskia in Scadbury Nature Reserve.
It was such a lovely experience for all of us. My husband had reservations about it, but really enjoyed himself and didn’t find it awkward at all, which he had been worried about.
We brought in a surprise guest, nanny, and she was thrilled to be included too.
Photos are absolutely stunning, relaxed, informal and tell a story, just what we wanted.
Thoroughly recommend her!”
— Satu Francis
This is exactly what I hear time and time again. The worry beforehand is real, but so is the relief afterwards of having had a comfortable, fun time.
Your Partner Might Just Surprise You
At the end of the day, the goal of a family session isn’t perfect photos. It’s real connection, real memories, and real love—captured in a way that feels easy and true to who you are.
So if your partner is feeling on the fence, share this with them. Let them know they’ve got every right to be themselves, messy hair and well-worn hoodie included. And if they need to ease into it, that’s fine too. There’s space for everyone to feel comfortable, relaxed, and fully themselves in our time together.
When they see the photos later—the joy, the warmth, the honest-to-goodness realness of family life—they’ll be so glad they said yes.
Ready to Include the Whole Family in Your Documentary Session?
If you’re thinking of booking a relaxed family photography session in London and your partner’s feeling unsure, let’s talk. I’m always happy to answer questions and help everyone feel informed and excited.
Reach out here to book or connect.
And if you want to share a bit more about your family and your hopes for your session, I’d love to hear all of it. This is a collaboration, and I’m here to make it an experience you’ll all enjoy—reluctant partner included.
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